


the can opener

by fallintolife



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, This is pure crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-04
Updated: 2020-02-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:28:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22552513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallintolife/pseuds/fallintolife
Summary: A lady knight has lost her way and must ask a local merwoman for directions.
Relationships: Lady Knight / Merwoman
Kudos: 13





	the can opener

**Author's Note:**

> hoist: Give us a lady knight getting seduced by a mermaid u cowards  
> hoist: Mermaid sitting there with a pussy-out look and a can opener

Twas in the year of our lord 2069 that I first laid eyes upon my paramour.

The most beautiful mer-woman I had ever seen in my time on earth reclined upon a rock at the edge of the Voidsea. Her eyes were lidded, but I dared not hope it was I for whom her loins burned.

I can in no way do justice to her beauty, but I must tell you that her curves were more generous than a Yesuit’s purse, her eyes less fathomable than the Voidsea itself, and her hair as luxurious as the courts of the ultra-burghers. As I had just traversed the entirety of the Sucrose Wastes in a full plate of mail, metal-clad legs forging through knee-high glowmud, I knew myself lacklustre in the face of her glowing countenance.

I looked away to compose myself. I had to beg of this mer-woman the way to the City of Lies, and it would not do to have lust in my gaze when I did so. No matter how much my nethers cried out for relief.

When I turned in her direction again, I stopped before I could take more than a single step. For in her hand, swaying slowly from side to side, was an ancient relic of the old world: a can opener.

Was it a threat, or a promise? No, no. It must be some undersea symbol I was ignorant of. An offer of trade, perhaps. It was hardly her fault that my mind was drawn to carnality.

I took a deep breath, dropping my gaze to the ground. She deserved the utmost respect, and my thoughts did not contain it.

My eyes alighted upon her again, and I managed two steps before I stopped once more. For her tongue slid from her mouth, tracing along the edge of her lips. And God-Kings be with me, there was the unmistakable glint of metal in the center of that pink tongue.

From my throat erupted a noise the likes of which can only be perceived in the heavens, and my eyelids slammed shut immediately. There are stories from ages long past of mer-women dragging knights to their deaths beneath the waves, devouring them whole. I would be strong. If I kept my distance, and spoke politely, she would direct me and I would not risk myself.

Indeed, as she certainly did not mean to imply what I read into her gestures, it would be for the best.

My fourth and final gaze upon the mer-woman revealed a sign that even I, a Sapphic Knight, could not mistake. I will not be so crass as to describe it, but it left me no doubt as to what she wanted and that I was the one she blessed with that desire.

I understood, as I hastened into her embrace, what bliss can be found in surrendering to the deeps.


End file.
